Rushed marriage is a recipe for a quickie divorce. It’s like having a honeymoon over and over!” Kathryn- “I tell people (jokingly) all the time that it’s what kept my marriage together. For example, if you were married for 12 years, and one spouse was in the military for seven of those 12 years of marriage, the other spouse would not be entitled to a direct payment from DFAS. The number of people who WENT to training engaged and are now married/pregnant with somebody else entirely is astonishing. Everything after that has been easy. ... United States Army on Reddit. A military attorney cannot represent you or your spouse in a family law court but can refer you to a nongovernment civilian lawyer. I'm also going to tell you this with the full knowledge that your relationship would probably only last slightly longer if you got married, and the end of it would be much messier and painful in a number of ways. One of them emailed their branch manager explaining they didn't want to rush into marriage but they were in a serious relationship. Do not marry someone while you are in A-School. And it’s good on both sides. For service members, when you’re married, the military provides separate housing and that means sayonara to … It’s … Honesty Goes a Long Way. We barely had sex and our connection seemed completely gone. I think the key is having a spouse that actually has a strong work ethic. We do have our own hobbies and interests. Dude, video games have been where we had the biggest issue too! Why are you so eager to get your first ex-wife? There will be a day I'm not a soldier, but I will still have a wife. Military couples put duty first -- not their marriages. If you do get a divorce, the military typically won’t stop the extra pay right away. I think you'll be fine. 176k. 6 comments. Somebody else other than me knows! Let’s see: 1. “I'm a guy and I don't go look for woman to have something with rules and regulations,” wrote one soldier. Whats the worst military relationship/marriage story you have? Members. Military legal assistance attorneys are available to help you understand the implications of your divorce. I will reiterate what others have said. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Or 30! What an achievement when it comes to the subject of marriage, and in the internet as well. He was able to get them in the same state. During Job Training. “Whether married, single, or a dependent,” the researchers write, “relocation loomed large as an anticipated event in the lives of each of the interviewees. I knocked up my wife within a week of meeting her. I've been here for just about a year now and will be graduating soon. because she thought there were multiple save files like sonic. Marriage in the military. Military marriage is moving to a new home every few years, and making it the best-darn-coziest-eat-your-heart-out-ikea home you ever did see.. Military marriage is learning to roll with the punches. Created Feb 24, 2009. If you get married in AIT or afterwards and your spouse is stationed elsewhere, the Army will not just up and move you. For men, marriage equals slavery: “Marriage, in essence, is a man choosing his slave master.” For men, marriage equals unrequited sacrifice: “So … Sounds like a lot of other marriages are quick passionate ones with spouses that have no aspirations in life other than being a couch potato and believe that a stay at home mom is the hardest job in the world. I work in an office where only one out of the five other AGRs/AC Soldiers is still on his first marriage. 1.7k. Many marriage counselors are of the notion that money is the root cause divorce in military marriages (Crown and Karney, 2007). I'm going to tell you this with the full knowledge that your relationship will utterly fall apart in that time, you will realize during your LDR that the biggest thing keeping you together was simple proximity and lack of options. How do I file state taxes separately? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. (I broke it on my own volition and idea to show her how important it is compared to her). That means leaving at a good time every day and not letting work affect home. 10) I knew it. Dear Ms. Vicki, I am a 70-year-old retired USN E-9 who is considering marriage for the first time. We use cookies on our websites for a number of purposes, including analytics and performance, functionality and advertising. The most common marriage catalyst, Lundquist and Xu found, was a permanent change of station (PCS). Go to your first duty station and wait a year. I met a girl here in the process and we've been together for almost 10 months now. you goddamn pariah. I spent 26 years in the Navy and another 21 with the DEA. Edit: inb4 if you don't like it get promoted. How To Have A Successful Military Marriage. I finally convinced my girlfriend to move down here and make the first moves towards marriage. share. Subscribe for more Videos. Don't do it now. Also, since u won't even have a chance to be stationed together for 2 years, maybe you should think about seeing how it is being apart and in a relationship (get engaged if you want to, but you may have several years apart so see if you can manage that first so you don't end up in the divorce line). Created Feb 24, 2009. I was completely honest with no glitches or cheats in that game. Marriage Before Enlistment: Timing Your Military Marriage. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. ... United States Army on Reddit. A month after you get there. I am active duty military, from Nebraska. This is why you should rush into marriage.. How to go about order picking in the navy. By Taylor Kass Published Mar 12, 2021 Erik Lake, who married Virginia Coombs on this season of Married at First Sight, took to Reddit to address fans' concerns concerning his online presence and his political beliefs. I know marrying someone soon is a bad idea but my question is, how would getting married work for when we both get stationed somewhere? The closest time my wife and i have ever come to splitting it off was when she saved over my pokemon silver game that had 300 hours and an almost full pomedex. She saw me behead some poor civilian in skyrim (I was doing the assassin chain) and was REALLY not happy. Online. There are military marriage rules for some groups of people who are in the process of joining the military. We've been together 12 years this month. There also is a stigma against working things out when things get rough (like going to FREE military onesource marriage counseling). Shit, I almost punched a kid when he told me that his little sister saved over my Pokemon Silver ver. PROS OF THE DUAL MILITARY MARRIAGE. Join. You're 28 and unmarried in Texas? Military OneSource provides answers to your questions about getting married in the military and guides you from walking down the aisle to connecting to your new service family to keep your relationship military strong. 15 Cheaters Confess How Their Affair Started And Ended (Reddit) Every different person has a story about how and what went down, read to find out more. I think the issue is that the Army culture seems to promote the idea that marriage is simply a step up from girlfriend/boyfriend, not a completely life-altering commitment that should be permanent except in extreme situations. While common marriage advice holds that a person should place his or her marriage above all else, military spouses often don't. Service members can face relocation every 2–3 years. Look up the "married army couple program" MACP... Never guaranteed to get stationed together and at this point you won't be eligible to relocate till you have 24 months time on base. I have seen it.... soldier showed up, got married enroute, said her spouse went to Carson, she got Bliss and went to S-1 to find out the paperwork she needed she could get moved. So thank you to all contributing to this. I do think it's bullshit that I was a 21 year old e-5 in an e-6 billet who decided to not stick his dick in crazy and therefor am forced to live in the barracks with joe, while 18 year old Pvt snuffy gets that sweet sweet BAH because he married Susie rottencrotch from sharkies. 45. It's 2017 dude, you can just come out already. She left her job at the university we both graduated from for a position in non-profit consulting where she can work remotely and will travel for work Tuesday-Thurs each week. save. Say we both get stationed in different places, could be both take leave, get married, then would the army move us to the same station? We plan on having kids in the next few years once we tie the knot. Repayment. Imagine living in a 10x10 room with a roommate. I ended up breaking the disk (I was 2/3s the way through too) to show her that her opinion mattered more than some video game. I knew a couple who had the same worries. First, a little about me: I'm 28, unmarried, no dependents. Join. Long marriage in the military is not the opposite of divorce. You will be required to do a stint of duty at your location before you are reassigned. It sounds like you know what your priorities are and thats cool. "The first time, I was too young (23), got into it way too fast, and didn't pump … In regards to number 11, I don't mind that PLs get BAH, they need to pay officers more to keep it competitive with comparable jobs for people with degrees. We are both stationed in North Carolina. 174k. About Community. Just gotta say, I am really loving the positivity of this marriage sub Reddit. If you still want to marry her, go for it. 944. There also is a stigma against working things out when things get rough (like going to FREE military onesource marriage counseling). No one is going to care. 42. Considering how many stressors a young military marriage must face, that fact alone ought to be enough to convince us that everybody in the military ought to be single until, say, age 25. The NCO just chuckled and said welcome to Bliss and in processed her. Living with this reality often requires a lot of patience, said Alison Perkins, who serves as the editor of a military spouse resource website, SaluteToSpouses.com. Neither of us has kids. Word of advice. So right now I'm just finishing my AIT. Also, each military service branch offers programs designed to enrich marriage and maintain a healthy relationship by helping couples develop better communication skills and rekindle the romance. I met a girl here in the process and we've been together for almost 10 months now. Here are a few situations a dual- military couple can anticipate: Separations – Deployments or remote assignments , and the separation that comes with them, are a fact of life for many military families. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. Another problem is that a lot of people in the Army tend to quickly marry girls like Tiffany the hairdresser. A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage… Got married after knowing each other for about 2 months....still married 9 years later. If you keep that attitude, you will definitely still have a wife. OP, I saw plenty of guys get married young after short relationships, and it very often fails. Marriage for Green Card Reddit What You Need to Know About Marrying In the Military and all other pictures, designs or photos on our website are copyright of their respective owners. We see each other at least once or twice a month. To get the fuck out of the barracks. We're of course the exception but it can work. I'm gonna assume you met here roughly in the same area you did your AIT. So right now I'm just finishing my AIT. Provided the marriage is a healthy and supportive union, the military benefits system works most efficiently to support you when your marriage takes place before enlistment. You should have to be a SPC or go down range (which ever comes first) before you can start receiving BAH and benefits for a spouse and family, IMO. She uses a single-serving mayonnaise packet for lube. I'm not planning on giving her a ring until she's finished moving down here. We've been together over two years now, most of it long distance. ... Our marriage had turned into something that made me really unhappy. Yet we study the divorce rate among couples married less than five years as if that explained everything. Some say society itself contributes to divorce cases, but more value placed on individualism, self-expression, self-realization, and choice of personnel are the main causes of increasing military … Source: Have been in the Army long enough to see how AIT love goes down literally dozens of times. What do you do to make it work? To authenticate the marriage, couples have joint bank accounts, and the spouse may be entitled to the soldier's basic allowance for housing or other military benefits, he said. Put a halt to all these shitty rushed marriages. Being open and honest is an important pillar of any strong marriage. Another problem is that a lot of people in the Army tend to quickly marry girls like Tiffany the hairdresser. You just went through a lifechanging event (boot camp) and it only appears that you share 95% commonality with everyone in school with you. I'm going to tell you to hold off until like a year after the Army splits you up and sends you to separate duty stations. Jacobs, a military analyst for NBC News and MSNBC, says these soldiers aren't looking for love; they want that marriage certificate. Congratulations - you're getting married! They were too young. If there's any other good information to know, that'd be helpful thanks. General Advice from r/Navy: 1. If you're doing the Asterisk Tip, you probably shouldn't be in a relationship. Where they were at opposite ends of the country before. In fact, you probably should be questioning your life choices at that point. I didn't talk to her for 3 days. My dad was a career Navy officer and my parents are still together, but it seems that many Army marriages don't work out. we get our pictures from another websites, search engines and other sources to use as an inspiration for you. The reality is that you only know them in the context of a-school. If a technical school, AIT, or A-school is 20 weeks or longer in duration (at a … Share. Met wife in ait. Members. Where's your AIT? Usually 24 months. Edit: I'm USAR AGR so I will PCS on the same schedule as AC. "Military One Source" is another beneficial marriage-related program. I wish I could up vote this more than once. Here are some important things to keep in mind: Make sure your relationship is military … Entering your military marriage with realistic expectations can help prepare you for what’s to come. The National Guard has been the conundrum of the military world since their establishment in 1636. I'm 23, not sure if that would change anything. A military contract marriage is the practice of a service member marrying someone (sometimes another service member) just to land additional military … We just signed a new lease together so it's pretty solid now. And the number who have already gotten married and divorced is moreso. I take my marriage a lot more seriously than I take my career. By Kelly O Published Jun 20, 2017. Wish my old Platoon Sergeant had that attitude his thought process was I gotta be here until 1900 so my NCOs. My husband is also active duty military, from Idaho. I had a shiny graveler and a bunch of trade evolution pokemon. My friend just called his wife and he heard clapping in the background but she wasn't clapping. Online. So don’t … Rachel- “When you see each other so rarely that the naked time is AMAZING. I'm an AGR officer stationed in Houston. It seems that it's a curse of the Army. Other military couples feel deployment sex pacts dilute the sanctity of marriage. I ask because my friend just called his wife in front of me and it wasn't pretty. A contract marriage is when two people enter into a marriage in order to receive the (sometimes hefty) benefits afforded to military spouses. Fuck people who had a marriage and family before joining, right? I've been married for 10 years, six of which are active duty. I've been here for just about a year now and will be graduating soon. For about 2 months.... still married 9 years later Asterisk Tip, you will be graduating soon to! The Asterisk Tip, you will definitely still have a wife rarely that the naked time is AMAZING married... 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